First of all...I'm so excited! I've managed to snag a great job as a new construction listing coordinator at a great real estate company (mostly thanks to my sister!) I start either the day after or two days after I get there...no time to relax! I'm super excited for this opportunity and to get started working but I'm also really nervous...it's going to be stressful and I have a lot to learn. But I'm going in confident that I'm more than capable!
For my job...I pretty much need to buy a whole new wardrobe. I'm really freaking excited about it. I've worn yoga pants and t-shirts to work for the past two years which has been nice (and comfy!) but I'm excited to have nice clothes and dress up and look nice for work everyday. And I'm excited I'll finally be able to afford to go shopping. I haven't been able to afford to shop for myself in years. I've been pinning like crazy. Here's some of my favs. Here's my Pinterest board if you want to see more!
I'm going to be living with my mom for awhile. I'm ok with it. I'm so happy and appreciative that she's letting me live with her rent free. I'm going to save as much money as I can while I don't have rent to pay!
The only thing I'm sad/not looking forward to is leaving Rayce. I've been with him almost everyday for 2 years and now we're just going to be apart. We haven't really talked about it. We've been going on like normal since I decided to move. Nothing's different. We haven't talked about what's going to happen when I leave. Are we just breaking up? Are we still going to talk everyday? Should we not talk for awhile? I don't know and I'm afraid to talk about it and he obviously is too. Our relationship has been changing for the past few months. At least I think it has. A lot of the time I feel like we're just roommates/friends. I also feel like neither one of us has made the effort to do something about it because we've known that I'm leaving anyways. And he doesn't want to move so...I don't know. It's complicated. I love him so much....I guess we just aren't meant to be together.
So many feelings and emotions lately. It's exhausting. I've not been sleeping very well a lot of nights. My brain doesn't shut off. I lay in bed and I can't stop thinking about all of this. About a new job, finding new friends, living with my mom again, not being with Rayce...it just does. not. stop.
I'm so ready to focus on building a career with this company and just "doing me" as they say. Whatever that means. All I know is that I'm going to focus on work and make time to continue working out. The rest will fall into place. At least that's what I'm counting on.
Phew...brain dump.
